As of 2023 65.1 million U.S. households own a dog. That is a jump of almost 20% since 2016. It is safe to assume, that with that amount of dogs being owned, bites will happen. Much like owning and riding a horse does not preclude one from getting bucked off (in fact, some would argue that the probability of getting bucked off a horse increases exponentially when you ride horses). Owning a dog, showering them with love, affection and all they can eat does not prevent one from getting bit. Some would say it raises the probability of coming in contact with a bite exponentially. However, there are no two ways about it, getting bit by one’s own dog hurts. It hurts physically and emotionally. It is hard to be objective when someone you absolutely love causes you pain. That will always be true. So what to do if your own dog bites you? My best advice is to be proactive, not reactive. We are humans and have a tendency of making all situations personal. Therefore grieving for a period of time and then surrendering to the thought that the bite was not personal is extremely helpful. However, the most important thing one can do is to seek professional help. Allowing a neutral party to sort out how the relationship got so unbalanced is the best thing you can do to heal the break in trust.
Dogs do not bite by mistake. They are conditioned from a very young age to use their mouths with care. In the very same way we teach our young not to slap or punch, dog mothers and the pack teach their young where, how and how strongly to use their mouths. Young pups often wrestle with each other and hone in the ability to calibrate the amount of strength to use when playing. That, in turn, helps them to be more social and understand when they have gone too far. A yelp will often make them stop dead in their tracks. It is the dog equivalent of “you have gone too far”. Hence why it is so important not to remove puppies from their pack before they are, at least, 4 months old. This is how they learn to socialize and to calibrate their strength and drives.
Nevertheless we live in a world where puppies are, more often than not, removed from their pack way too soon. Where dog ownership has become so prevalent, with not everyone doing the research and often going by looks alone; we have gotten to an era where a dog biting their owner has become more and more ordinary. Make no mistake about it, a dog biting their owner is not something to be dismissed. It is, in fact, a very serious development. The trust and respect is gone when that happens. Like a child slapping their mother, or their friend, it is something that should make one pause and take stock. The communication has broken down and has to be fixed. My advice, in either case, would be to seek professional help. Search for a trainer or behaviorist to help you mend the hurt. Be prepared to listen and to understand that, very much like with human relations, trust will return when it returns. One can’t force it. But we can all work to regain it once lost.
The essential difference between dog training and dog rehab is time. If your dog has a bite history, surrender to the certainty that any amount of training or behavior modification will take a lot longer than the typical 3 weeks of board and train. In addition to that, be honest with yourself in admitting it will take longer than three weeks for the trust in your relationship to come back. Getting bit sucks and it feels worse when you have ownership of the dog. There is no point in placing blame. The best thing one can do is find a way to bring the trust and respect back.
The biggest mistake dog owners make, is believing that it was a fluke and it won’t happen again. Your dog is literally begging you for help. Having bit a member of their pack is the definition of a dog that is in dire need of more direction. Find a trainer or behaviorist that you trust and have them help you to bring balance back to the relationship. Allow yourself time to heal both physically and mentally – it will be harder than you think. While being proactive in working to mend the break in trust. Time heals all wounds, but it doesn’t necessarily point us to the right direction. If you have a dog that has bitten you, you need help to heal the break in communication Being proactive in finding someone that can help will be infinitely more useful than simply going on with business as usual. It will allow you to be a participant in healing a relationship that has gone sour.
