Humans need an average of 9 hours of sleep in a 24-hour period. We spend 1/3 of our lives sleeping. Evolution tells us if rest wasn’t important we wouldn’t devote so much of our lives to it. Sleep, rest, downtime are a need. It is where our brains reset. Nevertheless, we seem to have forgotten the importance of downtime where our system gets to absorb lessons and let go of what isn’t important to carry. Dogs need an average of 13 hours of sleep in a 24-hour period for exactly the same reasons. Most of my clients are shocked to hear how much sleep dogs need. Many of them come to understand their pup much better after learning this. Since we share so much of our lives with dogs, is it any wonder that many of our pups are acting out simply because they are not being given enough time to simply rest? We are, once again, transferring our bad habits to our dogs when we deprive them of the opportunities to shut down, to sleep or simply be.
One of the first things I do when a dog comes to stay with me is to give them a chance to decompress. Just allowing them time to figure out where they are and feel at ease. Some dogs take a couple of days to get in the groove. Many, however, need a couple of weeks. These are dogs that are literally strung out. They have never experienced the feeling of surrender outside of sleep. These are the dogs that I often describe as being either ON or OFF. They do not understand the meaning or the sensation of simply being. These are dogs that need a lot of downtime. Time to reset, to literally learn how to do nothing. Very much like their owners, these dogs are hyper sensitive to any and all stimuli. They have imprinted that humans (or dogs, to the world around them) represent fight – flight because their humans are never able to stand still. Or because their owners have been taught that a dog must always be physically drained to be fulfilled; their days are filled with daycare, walks, games of fetch, etc. Both equate to a dog that is mentally exhausted and frazzled. They are unable to follow direction because they are always needing to do something. Hence why they take time.
Yes, a dog needs physical exercise in order to be the best version of themselves. Similar to us, the body needs to be healthy and active in order for the mind to mirror that. Nevertheless, we are living in an age where rest has become synonymous with laziness. Being idle means being unproductive or worse: scrolling on our phones. We have lost the ability to simply be. To enjoy moments, periods of nothingness. We can’t fathom the idea of being bored, with nothing to do. The issue is that is not natural. All mammals spend most of their time resting or being “idle”. Think of all the nature documentaries you have seen: if animals are not hunting for food or mating they are in a state of rest. Except us, we have pushed aside the concept of “sleeping on it” in order to solve a problem. Or to let our minds reset and maybe come up with novel ideas. And since our dogs are ever more present in our lives, they simply mimic our behavior. The amount of dogs with “separation anxiety,” hyperactivity, or “unexplained” behavioral issues has skyrocketed in the past few years. Is it any wonder why? A restless mind is a recipe for an unbalanced mind. If rest is not part of the conversation, how can we expect our dogs to simply be in our presence?
Dogs, like humans need physical exercise in order to help our minds. But our minds and bodies need rest to absorb what we have experienced, especially when we are learning new things. So try practicing moments of stillness with your dog. As my mentor once said: “Doing nothing is doing something.” It is allowing ourselves to simply be in the role of the observer. To quiet the mind in order to participate more fully in the present moment. Next time you are out for a walk with your dog, try sitting down in a comfortable and quiet space for 10 minutes and simply be, asking your dog to do the same. Let’s start showing our dogs that their guardians are a source of calmness, stillness and restful intervals during our days together. This will make all of our lives more balanced.
